First Week After First Treatment and Brain MRI Results - 8/16/24

Writing this post after my port surgery today and I am still a bit woozy from the anesthesia, so we will see how this goes!  Before diving into this past week, I wanted to just share my appreciation and gratitude for the outpouring of love and support from so many people near and far.  I am feeling overwhelmed (in a good way) with feeling so loved and cared for.  I don’t know how to say thank you enough.  What I do know though, is every time the medical team asks me questions about the support in my life through this journey (and it’s been a lot), I can say with 100% confidence that I have the best support system there is. 

First, I want to give an update on my test results this week. I had my Brain MRI on Saturday, and I am so happy to share that my Brain is NORMAL!!!  That is a HUGE win that I am so happy about! I believe the nurse actually said the words, “Your brain is perfect,” so that might be an extra win right there.  And not to toot my own horn, but I thought, my brain HAS to be in good shape with no tumors as I have been able to think well at work, beat my dad at chess games (love you dad), do puzzles and handle everything going on mentally.  So good news there! 

I had my liver biopsy on Monday, and still waiting for results to come back (likely hear more next Tues. or Wed).  The nurse was able to confirm that the tumors are from my breast, but not yet the type of cancer.  My hope is that it is the same HER2 that’s in my breast and not another one that is harder to treat, so fingers crossed!

On Tuesday we met with the Genetic Counselor to discuss my family history of tumors and cancer.  The meeting was rather interesting and informative, I learned a lot in a 40min conversation about genetics and felt like I could go on and on about the topic.  I plan to do genetic testing of the cancer markers to determine if I have any of the high-risk breast cancer genes which could at least explain a possible reason for why I got this, although it cannot fully conclude or rule out genetics as a reason alone.  Another reason for the testing is that treatments can be tailored later depending on the types of genes I have, which sounds amazing.  I did also learn this week that a couple of my aunts might have had lump removed that was positive for breast cancer years ago, so learning that has made me think more that this might have been genetic – and I was the lucky one chosen for this club. 

Wednesday and Thursday this week I met with a psychologist, social worker and checked in with a nurse about my tolerance to treatment.  Loved talking with both the psychologist and social worker who are there to listen and support me through this difficult time.  Although I am not sure how “difficult” of a time they thought I was having.  At one point the psychologist mentioned I am ahead of most people and doing all the right coping and cognitive behavioral skills.  Probably was the easiest hour for him in a while.  While I do find this time difficult, I am feeling incredibly optimistic, hopeful and positive.  Could be my daily breathwork and meditation, or I could just be deranged 😊  I might still be in the denial phase of grief and I know that in time, there will be challenging emotional times.  Like I said in my last post, I have not yet fully processed this news and gone through the acceptance and healing quite yet.  In any case, I refuse to believe I am going to be the statistics you read on Google (please stop Googling) and I choose to believe that our bodies can heal themselves with the right set of circumstances – I am on that side of the coin.  My chiropractor actually gave me a book this week called “The Cancer Killers – The Cause is the Cure” and as I was walking back to my car, I just flipped to a page at random and read a couple paragraphs.  The pages I flipped to (42,43) were about maximized mindset and the paragraph that stuck out to me was “As Dr. Siegel pointed out, although given the same treatments for the same conditions, some died and some survived.  He noted that the unique thread common to those who lived was that they had the powerful coping mindset of an overcomer.  Overcomers do not feel like victims.  They take action and know they will win!” – I mean, this is how I have been feeling and to flip to this page was like fate.  Now I don’t know what the future will hold, but I do believe everything happens for a reason. 

Similarly to this topic, I have been listening and learning from the community of some strong women who have been on this journey for a while.  They are so inspiring themselves and are teaching me a lot, already (mostly from Instagram – social media can be good in this world).  What I learned is the fight to live, fight against breast cancer, is not about winning or losing.  At the end of the day, if someone passes from breast cancer, it doesn’t mean that they didn’t fight hard enough or lost at all.  It’s reframing the idea of fighting and winning.  Although one may win, no one loses at the end of the day, and everyone is doing their absolute best through this journey.  These are tidbits of things I am learning and leaning into the beautiful community out there.

As far as the side effects from the first treatment this week, they have been minimal I’d say.  I do notice I feel more tired and sluggish, especially in the afternoons to evenings.  I only got sick one morning, which was before my liver biopsy and was nervous I wasn’t going to make it for my appointment, but I did!  I have been chugging so much water daily as it is important to stay hydrated.  The other day I was craving so much salt I believe I bought pickles, olives and pickled beets, drank most of the juice in the pickle jar and proceeded to the olive jar next.  Trying to figure out what works!  Overall though I am feeling good, and I know in the future that might change as the chemo progresses, so taking it one day at a time and appreciating days I feel good to get out and do things.

Just a few other notes about this week – I am slowly going to detox my life from eating the right foods, giving up alcohol (did this the day I found out I had BC), exercising a lot and buying clean ingredient products.  I have been on Amazon way too much this week and bought a juicer, an Alkaline Water Filter, some immunity boosting products, an infrared light sauna, just to name a few.  It is about time I give my body and mind what it deserves.

Speaking of exercise, the nurse said I cannot lift more than 15 pounds our do strenuous activity for a week after my port surgery today.  I guess that is a good excuse to give my restless body some rest, but there will be many walks in my near future!

But today was the last day of the MANY appointments before I go into my weekly treatment, which begins again next Monday.  I am looking forward to sharing with you all the progress these treatments will have over time, and I again want to thank you all for being by my side every step of the way. 

Love, Stacy